As I sit here typing my mind is racing with a million thoughts. How do I share them in a logical and reasoned way? The more I have studied early Christian history the more saddened I have become. The rock band R.E.M. wrote a song "Losing My Religion" and that is how I am feeling right now.
The religion, faith, church, Holy Bible, and Jesus I was taught as a child is not the same. It has lost its innocence.
I am reading the book by Philip Jenkins called Jesus Wars which is the history of the 5th and 6th-century Christian church and its faith. The government and church (Roman Catholic) and other Christian groups like the Gnostics and Monophysites were all fighting over the nature of Jesus. Some believed Jesus was fully divine and others believed He was fully human and divine which created no small stir of emotions. The short version is they voted in 451 A.D. in the Council of Chalcedon that Jesus was fully human and fully divine, two natures, which began a schism within Christendom. But what is so sad is that groups of Christians with different views of Jesus were killing each other or torturing each other to "win" a victory for their group. Did they forget the sixth Commandment "You must not murder."?
There was more intrigue to the history of the early Christian church to make TV soap operas jealous. Eventually, one side won out which is the side we call "orthodox" today. This does not mean the right side won which is very hard for some to accept. But then again the right side might have won but in either case, God still is God regardless if humans might have made a mistake in not listening more carefully to the Holy Spirit. They voted in councils what books and letters would be considered "of God" and which ones were not. They voted on what we would believe is correct faith and what should be "heresy" much like Congress trying to pass a bill.
It has been only in the last 15 years that lost books that were once considered from God have been found and published so it is available to the public to read. The Nag Hammadi find in 1945 from the Gnostics written in the 2nd century and the Dead Sea Scrolls found between 1947 to 1956 at Khirbet Qumran had 972 texts dating in the 1st and 2nd centuries. Most recently a text of Judas Iscariot was procured and adds more light to those ancient days.
I guess I could put my head in the sand and ignore all this and keep to my childhood beliefs that God came in person and dictated what He wanted in the Holy Word and then told the writer to pass the papyrus over to the next writer. That everyone got along and God told them face to face in the councils what they are to believe and that Christian history is one big peace festival. I could go the opposite extreme and stop all belief and be an atheist or go the middle road and be agnostic after learning how the Christian Church conducted itself after the Roman Empire made it a legal religion.
If there were no scriptures I still could not look at all the stars in the sky at night and not believe there was a great Creator. If there was no church I still would feel within my soul the awe and wonder of life itself and feel something within my being that I was not alone.
What I have had to realize is humanity is corrupted and God is patiently working with and in everyone, every church, every nation in a loving, understanding way. A way that is beyond my comprehension, a way that makes God, well, God. I have free will, I have a choice, and I choose to still believe there is a God regardless of critics or historical findings or the way the church conducted itself in the early centuries. This is why it is called faith, the belief in something that is real but cannot be seen or proven. As I said before if there were no holy writings or religious structures I could still believe in a great Creator God which I call this faith, "Naked Faith", faith in God with no religious trappings.
People will disappoint you, churches will disappoint you, governments will disappoint you, at times you will even be disappointed in yourself but God will not disappoint you if you allow your naked faith in God to comfort you. So, in the end, I learned that yes, I have lost my religion but in so doing I have gained a stronger faith in God. Amen.
The religion, faith, church, Holy Bible, and Jesus I was taught as a child is not the same. It has lost its innocence.
I am reading the book by Philip Jenkins called Jesus Wars which is the history of the 5th and 6th-century Christian church and its faith. The government and church (Roman Catholic) and other Christian groups like the Gnostics and Monophysites were all fighting over the nature of Jesus. Some believed Jesus was fully divine and others believed He was fully human and divine which created no small stir of emotions. The short version is they voted in 451 A.D. in the Council of Chalcedon that Jesus was fully human and fully divine, two natures, which began a schism within Christendom. But what is so sad is that groups of Christians with different views of Jesus were killing each other or torturing each other to "win" a victory for their group. Did they forget the sixth Commandment "You must not murder."?
There was more intrigue to the history of the early Christian church to make TV soap operas jealous. Eventually, one side won out which is the side we call "orthodox" today. This does not mean the right side won which is very hard for some to accept. But then again the right side might have won but in either case, God still is God regardless if humans might have made a mistake in not listening more carefully to the Holy Spirit. They voted in councils what books and letters would be considered "of God" and which ones were not. They voted on what we would believe is correct faith and what should be "heresy" much like Congress trying to pass a bill.
It has been only in the last 15 years that lost books that were once considered from God have been found and published so it is available to the public to read. The Nag Hammadi find in 1945 from the Gnostics written in the 2nd century and the Dead Sea Scrolls found between 1947 to 1956 at Khirbet Qumran had 972 texts dating in the 1st and 2nd centuries. Most recently a text of Judas Iscariot was procured and adds more light to those ancient days.
I guess I could put my head in the sand and ignore all this and keep to my childhood beliefs that God came in person and dictated what He wanted in the Holy Word and then told the writer to pass the papyrus over to the next writer. That everyone got along and God told them face to face in the councils what they are to believe and that Christian history is one big peace festival. I could go the opposite extreme and stop all belief and be an atheist or go the middle road and be agnostic after learning how the Christian Church conducted itself after the Roman Empire made it a legal religion.
If there were no scriptures I still could not look at all the stars in the sky at night and not believe there was a great Creator. If there was no church I still would feel within my soul the awe and wonder of life itself and feel something within my being that I was not alone.
What I have had to realize is humanity is corrupted and God is patiently working with and in everyone, every church, every nation in a loving, understanding way. A way that is beyond my comprehension, a way that makes God, well, God. I have free will, I have a choice, and I choose to still believe there is a God regardless of critics or historical findings or the way the church conducted itself in the early centuries. This is why it is called faith, the belief in something that is real but cannot be seen or proven. As I said before if there were no holy writings or religious structures I could still believe in a great Creator God which I call this faith, "Naked Faith", faith in God with no religious trappings.
People will disappoint you, churches will disappoint you, governments will disappoint you, at times you will even be disappointed in yourself but God will not disappoint you if you allow your naked faith in God to comfort you. So, in the end, I learned that yes, I have lost my religion but in so doing I have gained a stronger faith in God. Amen.
Comments
Post a Comment
Be kind and gracious.